Wedding conundrum

Hello again everyone.

This week I stopped to check my calendar and came to the realization that I’m stumped.  I have a total of 4 weddings this year between June and October (one of which is my own!) and am at the point that I’ve gone from confident and assured for what I wanted to do with my “beauty look” for each event, to somewhat overwhelmed and frankly pissed off at the overabundance of “options” and trends out there.

Now, for the wedding I’m just going to be attending (Wedding 1): no problemo.  I can whip up a look that coordinates the airbrushed looking skin, bold, exotic eye makeup and defined lip (probably a bit more towards the bold vs the nude that I usually do) looks that I’m known for, but in a way that says “special event” and works with the lovely saffron gown & jewelry I end up matching up for this fall New England wedding. And, knowing me, I’ll probably do some sort of updo or half-up/half-down do. Blah blah blah. Whatever. It’s not a day that I am supposed to be in the spotlight; I’m merely a witness to my girlfriend’s limelight moment. So, this lack of pressure gives me a much more relaxed atmosphere in which to ruminate through my multitude of shade options, and numerous treasure chests of makeup and cosmetics to figure out, through trial & error, what looks best with that gown. Relaxing to a degree, but still nagging at the back of my mind.  Stress rating:  a 2 to 3 on the scale of 1 to 10 (only so rated because it’s not a casual event, but a more black tie event, and is being held at a country club).

For the next wedding up in the stress scale (Wedding 2), there’s a new added dilemma…this one is a theme wedding, which is an instant upping of the stress factor, as the bridal couple has made a request that the attendees dress according to their theme if at all possible.  Now, I’ve already picked out the gown & accessories down to the shoes, and am hella confident that even though I’m just attending this one (again, this lessens the stress factor) I can pull this one off, and transform a regular event gown into their theme with just a few tweaks on the accessories side. This is bitchin, as I love a good challenge every now & then, and have my own horde of accessories that I love to try to use in different ways.  And their theme should be easy enough for me to work with and still retain savings in the bank.  I’m feeling like I’ve got this one in the bag, and have even mocked up the final product (minus the hair & makeup) to a place where I’m feeling pretty good about it all.  Yeah, baby, this is right up my alley, and I am gonna pull this one off **so long as none of the themed accessories suffer a fatal wardrobe malfunction, since I am not budgeted for replacing any theme items with my own wedding looming this year.  When you average out the themed dress code vs the attendee only factor, I’m getting a bit more of an overall stress level when preparing for this one. But, with the theme, I feel a bit more freedom to play with the makeup on this one, so I’m going to rate this wedding’s stress level as:  a 3 to 4 on the scale of 1 to 10.

The third wedding (Wedding 3) is one that’s a big family wedding, and while I’m not in the actual wedding party, I have been tapped to be a reader in the ceremony.  This is a big honor, and as such, is stressing me out the closer we get to this couple’s BIG DAY.  I think it’s the fact that I love these folks that’s making me a nervous wreck, as I don’t want to screw up their wedding photos in any way (the level of relation I am to them dictates that other than doing a reading, I will probably end up in at least 1 official wedding album photo).  I have the gown, and most of the accessories picked out, but due to the worry & stress, I have “options” (*translation: I can’t pick between certain items of jewelry to wear, and am now finding myself randomly worrying over things as stupid as to wear stand out studs vs chandelier earrings with this strapless gown…I mean, talk about #FirstWorldProblems, right).  And as those who know me well can tell you, sometimes I just shouldn’t have options, as I’ll make myself nuts over trying to pick the PERFECT ones, even though I know damn well that there is no such thing as perfect, and that sometimes the varieties can work either way.  So, of course, with my constant checking the dress with Option A vs Option B, I’ve somehow managed to save some of my accessories in a VERY SAFE PLACE (translation: misplaced) now with T minus less than a week to find them.  And did I mention that I volunteered to engineer the Bridal Emergency Kit?  Add another stress factor. I mean, I did all the research on beauty blogs, bridal blogs, Pinterest, Amazon.com, The Knot, etc. to see what was listed in all to spark my brain, and then cross reference the possibilities against the folks who’ll actually be at the wedding so that I don’t end up carting stuff no one would ever use.  And now, of course, I sit here and say: overall, I think I’m more worried about screwing something up at this wedding than I will be at my own! (ok, so in my mind, perhaps I’m mentally using this wedding as my “bridal trial” to see what the front-runner bridal makeup ideas that I have in the hopper as a possibility for my own day actually look like in professional photographs, so I don’t screw up my own photos on my own Big Day).  Stress factor:  7 out of 10.

Oddly enough, perhaps because I still have months to go before my own Big Day (Wedding # 4), I’m actually pretty calm about most of this same fashion & beauty stuff when it comes to my own walk down the aisle. So far, this is where I stand in my own prep:

Gown: check (*so long as the alterations go flawlessly so I fit the daggone thing come the Big Day).

Shoes: check (but do I customize them with “I Do” stickers that are so popular right now? Do I write a message on the soles? Do I do a design in blue glitter on the soles for my “something blue” like I saw on Pinterest? How about unique shoe clips? AHHH!!! TOO MANY OPTIONS!)

Veils: check. (Though I have 2 that I can layer together or wear solo. Not the biggest worry)

Jewelry:  again, I have options waiting in the wings from blingy with stones to traditional with pearls, and of course, options that fall in the mid ranges between the 2.

Headpieces:  well, I have 2. Love them both, but it depends on how my hair is done, and that’s a bunch of possibilities still, so back to Option Stress.

Makeup: here, I wanted to go more neutral, but everyone I know’s voting for more of a bold smoky eye look, and surprisingly enough, with my go-to green shadows.  I mean, my wedding colors are red & ivory…to add green makes my brain go right to Jolly Old Saint Nick and the Christmas Holidays (a big old CON).  But, I LOVE to do my eyes up with various shades of green, and I could do this look in the dark, no mirror, one arm tied behind my back (giant PRO).  Conversely, I don’t want to look back at my wedding album in 10 years and go “OMG! What the hell was I smoking??? Who let me put that dated looking makeup on for my Big Day? These photos TOTALLY scream “2000-teens” now! WAAHHH!!!!” (so, again, another big CON). See where I’m headed?

Stress factor:  today, at a 5, but as we inch closer to the actual event date, probably going to jump up the scale to a 9 before I stop, breathe, mentally tell myself off & slap myself, and get a grip! Then, it’ll go back to being a 2 to a 3, as it should be.

And do you know why I say this?

Here’s why:  Because I know that in the end, none of this crap really matters, for any of these weddings.  Weddings should really, deep down at the root of it all, just be about celebrating the love of those getting married, whether they’re friends, family, co-workers or even yourself.  The rest is just window dressing, pomp & circumstance, and fluff to stress one out about.  For all the perfectly drawn eyeliner and glamorous high heels, for all the rhinestones and veils, for all of the bobby pins and blush, if that’s all that one is REALLY focusing on, then there’s a way deeper problem.

So, now that I’ve vented and once again (since I do repeat daily whenever I feel the stress thoughts start trying to creep in) remembered that all this primping is all for show, not for keeps, and that the real stuff is the love I have for all of those in these weddings, I am back on Planet Common Sense.  I’ve put the Type A OCD Detail-Oriented Fashion & Beauty Ninny back in the box (where it should stay & come out no more!) and moved on.

Anyone here have any comments? Thoughts? Funnies to contribute to the topic of Wedding Beauty & Fashion prep?  Feel free to leave it below.